24 things I learned at 24

                              24 Things I Learned at 24

1. Prioritize your time.

It becomes a mandatory piece of your life. Getting your time right is one of the things that will help you with your personal and professional development. Your quality of life will skyrocket if you learn how to effectively manage your time.

2. Buy nice things.

Your financial burdens aren’t as impactful as they would be in your 40s when you have more responsibilities and potentially a family. Buy it while you can!

3. Start difficult conversations with “I’m just going to be honest.”

You’ll find being honest and talking about things is way easier than bottling up feelings that eventually will turn into resentment.

4. A set back is a set up for something better.

If something doesn’t work out the way you wanted to just remember it’s a set up for something better that will come in your future, whether it’s a new job or a new man in your life.

5. To get more of what you want, give more to what you have.

To get more of what you want, give more to what you have. Always give your full attention to what you have because if you spend so much time thinking about what you don’t have it takes your energy away from what you do have. Going forward, the ability to grow what you have is going to come from nourishing and cherishing what you have already. You learn to appreciate things more.

6. Uncertainty does not get easier.

Uncertainty does not get easier you just get more comfortable with dealing with it. Everything deals with the future and the future deals with everything uncertain. Just remember everything is going to be okay. Life is a continuous learning lesson.

7. Cultivate a private victory: Mental, Spiritual, and Physical.

Cultivate a private victory: mentally, spiritually, and physically. Take an hour a day to devote to these three areas in your life. Some people like to listen to podcasts. Some people like to go to a yoga class. Some people like to read a book. Find what works best for you. We’re good at some areas of our lives and most likely have mastered two out of three of these areas, but it’s the third one that when we can create this private victory, we even out our focus and growth in all three areas.

8. Trust your gut.

At every big crossroad don’t sit here and try to rationalize things, over analyzing it. If it comes from your gut you follow that voice and you will have more successful results.

9. What is my next objective?

We live in a world of so much anxiety. Depressed people live in the past while anxious people live in the future. That’s something I was once told that really stuck. Don’t be so focused on what your next objective is, just remember you’ll get there. Everyone gets there eventually just at a different pace.

10. Focus on the journey and not just on the destination.

Actively assess the learning process while it’s happening. The learning process is what gets you to your destination.

11. Love yourself first.

In order to give and receive love from other people, you have to love yourself first. This self-love shouldn’t be confused with always having to look like you have it together but its more about accepting yourself, taking care of yourself, and respecting yourself so that others can respect you. When you love and respect yourself people will have no other option than to respect you and love you the way you do.

12. Asking for help is a strength and not a weakness. 

All pride aside, when you are always trying to deal with something on your own it can make you feel physically and mentally exhausted trying to do too much. Other people exist in our lives for a reason. We have networks, support systems, friends, families, and a  number of resources to help us on our journeys. Don’t be too proud to ask for someone’s guidance, assistance, or perspective. There’s something you’ll take from them and you will be able to apply it wherever you are trying to go.

13. Real friends will stretch you, support you, and make you better.

I am truly blessed to have friends that I consider family. I have friends who have sat me down and have spoken to me in tough love terms, but terms that I needed to hear. They have called me out on things that I shouldn’t have done and have snatched me out of messes that I shouldn’t have been in. They have challenged me, they have encouraged me, they have pushed me to challenge myself. They have reminded me of my goals and helped me understand.

14. Positive people attract positive energy.

Positive people attract positive energy. I’ve come to realize that being positive attracts more people to you. It’s an infectious energy that people want to be around. I’ve always thought I’ve had a healing energy that always attracted people going through hurdles to me and now I understand why. Everyone wants to feel happiness and that is what positive energy reflects.

15. Success means different things to different people.

We go on social media and see this “image” portrayed by others and what they are putting forth. People put these positive projections of what they have out there and as ambitious people, it’s easy to compare ourselves but just remember, that is only one type of success, the type that doesn’t always make you feel fulfilled/happy. What does success mean to you? Better question, what is success? The amount of money you make? The title that came associated with what you’re doing? Was it the feeling that came with what you’re doing? Is it the balance you’ve learned to master between life at home and life at work? What does it mean to you? It’s not just about work, health, or relationships. It’s about what you truly want for yourself. You need to find and create your own definition of success. A definition that is unique to you and not based on the standards applied by other people.

16. Be able to articulate your value.

When you can express your value, you can express your values. This means you can express what you contribute to a situation and what matters to you. When you can master this, you can advocate for yourself in all areas of your life. You are able to identify where you stand, what is important to you, what you’re willing to deal with, what you are not willing to deal with, and what you’re willing to sacrifice in order to have certain types of things in your life. When you are able to articulate your value no one can take anything away from you because it’s something you’ve established for yourself. When you can articulate your value you will be able to live your life in a way that reflects you.

17. Actively reflect.

Actively reflect on your experiences and your emotions. This allows you to be more in the moment and realize maybe this situation isn’t the best for me. Actively pay attention to your own thoughts, emotions, and reactions. Are you overreacting or is somebody actually doing you harm? There is so much to be gained from negative and positive emotions and how you are contributing to the situation. You become aware of how someone is affecting your mood and practice active self-reflection.

18. Be disciplined.

The rewards of being disciplined and focused will be greater than you ever imagined. Personal growth is the greatest reward of who you become as a young adult.

19. Speak up.

Its okay to tell people how you feel. Get more comfortable with your voice. Speak up for yourself and enforce boundaries with family, with friends, and with men. It’s okay to be vulnerable and say you are not happy and you CAN walk away. I know this can be one of the most difficult decisions to make because along the road sometimes people do change but if that person is not serving you then remember it’s okay to walk away for now. You can always circle back but don’t force yourself to stay in a situation that doesn’t suit you.

20. Don’t compare yourself to others.

Process that you are a beginner in life and do not compare yourself to experts. Your journey has just begun. Don’t look at a situation and compare yourself to others whether that’s if someone is getting married, buying cars, becoming VP, etc. Again everything on social media is highlighted. Remember that. You are still learning in this landscape of life.

21. Enjoy every minute of rocky roads and bad decisions.

Life is not a ladder and no one goes straight to the top. The bad decisions you’ve made in your past make you who you are today. It’s an evolution. You evolve more and more every year.

22. Bringing someone ∨ doesn’t bring you ∧.

When you’re in a good place you can be happy for others. I think this has a lot to do with confidence and being 100 percent content with who you are and where you are going. Being happy and supportive towards others shows growth and respect.

23. Learn to forgive.

We need to forgive to free ourselves from our “captors”. If you don’t forgive others for what they have done to you-you become imprisoned, still hiding anger and resentment from your captor, which doesn’t free you. In the end, it just affects you while the other person lives their life freely. When you get angry it doesn’t solve the situation. As a result, you’re the one that gets burned because it expands so much of your energy and headspace to be in a negative place.

“Wish pure love and soft peace upon the ones who have been unkind to you and keep moving forward. This will free you both.”

24. As you get older kindness is the only thing that truly leaves an impact on people.

XO,

Lexi Allyson